May 14
I never had a “boys are icky and gross” phase I’ve literally been chasing dick since birth
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May 07
school doesnt even test your intelligence it tests your memory
it tests my patience
it tests my ability to hold my pee
it tests my ability to keep calm and not slap a bitch
whoa
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May 07
what did i just watch
I can’t believe that’s all in a teddy bear
WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK
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May 07
a little bit of everyone of these girls is in everyone
I think I just found my spirit animals
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May 04
my (mormon) roommate skyping with her sister
- Meg: So I still need birthday ideas for (your son). What do most five-year-old boys want these days?
- Sister: Well, I don't know about "most" five-year-olds, but I do know what mine wants.
- Meg: Yah?
- Sister: He'd like a skirt.
- Meg: Haha, wow! Really?
- Sister: Yes. He'd like you to make it.
- Meg: Hm. Okay. (*pulls out sketchpad*) I'll need his measurements. Oh, and ask if there are any particular patt--
- Sister: He wants polka dots. Like Minnie Mouse.
- Meg: Got it. So... what does (your husband) think about this?
- Sister: He just wishes it wasn't polka dots, for fashion's sake. And I can't really fault him for that.
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